Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Why does stuff keep happening to us?

When you think you're having a normal day, it all goes to fucking shit.

I was really tired this morning because I have just been so worn down. I spent all morning on the phone with the life insurance people, Barry's school, hospital finance and my sister and brother in law. I felt like throwing the phone against the wall because I am TIRED of talking. My hand hurts from holding the phone, so thank goodness I have speaker phone capabilities on my handset.

The baby and I had her WIC appointment at noon, and then had to head to the hospital to pick up the autopsy report and medical records. While I was there, I got a call from the county coroner. I thought it was quite strange, as Barry wasn't sent to the coroner. The Coroner called me because he and the health department both had been hounded for my information.

He was calling because there has been a media frenzy regarding my husband's death.

Unbeknownst to me, all this had been happening in the last week when it was released that a man around my husband's age had died of swine flu.

But I was never informed.

I found out today because the man that interviewed me had found out from the county health dept that it was confirmed to be H1N1. Thank you to the hospital for telling me he did not have H1N1. You suck. I had to be told by a news reporter. No one called me to think that maybe the wife might like to know how her husband got sick in the first place.

I was given the numbers of only two of the media outlets that wanted to talk to me, Kiro 7, and our local news paper. I was interviewed by both, and Kiro did a news story on us. I'll include the video at the end of the post. I did decided to contact them, on my own terms, to talk about what happened to us. And I am glad that I did, because perhaps people will see what a tragedy this is, how bad the flu can be.

While I was at the health department talking to the Doctor there, she gave me two prescriptions for Tamiflu, for both my son and I. We're both on it, and I am already noticing a bit of a change in how I feel. Since it was from public stock, it was also free. Thank goodness for that, because I would have had to pay $222 for two prescriptions!

Friday all the kids are getting their flu vaccines and the H1N1 vax. I will be getting the H1N1 as soon as I can find it. I will NEVER skip a flu vax again.
sorry I couldn't find the HTML to post it.

Sorry if this isn't much of a very emotional post, or not very well written, but I am tired, exhausted and don't feel like writing much tonight.


Anonymous said...

I have been following your twitter and blogs posts as well as your updates on GFs. I am so very sorry for your loss and the pain you are feeling right now. I haven't posted in either place yet because I haven't known what to say but after reading your last blog entry I just really want you to know that I have been thinking about you and your kids constantly and are keeping you in my prayers.

Crystal said...

You made me cry, I feel such agony for your loss and for your children. I have been following you for a couple weeks now. I am so sorry, Joanna. My son (13 months) has an appointment tomorrow for the flu shot and I have been a little on-the-fence about it, but I am not now. If the H1N1 is available to him, he is getting the vaccination. How I wish I could offer you a big hug.

I am praying for you, prayers do work. It is going to take some time, but it will get easier. By the way, you and your children are all so beautiful.

Queen Mumma said...

I just followed your link from a message board and wanted to express my sorrow. I have been and am in your situation. DD's dad died while I was pregnant with her. The only thing that kept me going was knowing I had our baby inside me. xoxo

Joanna's Dad said...

Thank-you to all who have expressed condolences and offered support to Joanna and the kids.
I'm Joanna's Dad and it means a lot to see there are so many people helping her out, even if it's through a blog such as this.

Loukia said...

I am so so so very sorry for your incredibly tragic loss... I wish you strength as you move forward, and I hope you and your children remember the amazing man that was/is their father/husband. God bless you guys... and thank you for sharing your story with everyone.