I have lost my inspiration lately, to be completely honest.
The past week was extremely hard for me, very emotional. Lots of firsts.
Here's what I did for the FIRST time by myself this week without Barry.
- Cooked a Turkey (he ALWAYS did this)
- Read The Night Before Christmas to the kids (again, his tradition)
- Put up the Christmas presents by myself, well, with the help of my bro and sis, but he always helped with this
- Barely persevered through our first Christmas without him.
- Made our traditional Christmas morning breakfast of homemade egg ham and cheese McMuffins
- I cooked the Turkey and it turned out freakin awesome! lol
- We did stockings on the 26th instead of Christmas morning
- Skipped out on all the baking. No no bakes this year or ANYTHING. Not even Barry's traditional trans-gender gingerbread man with boy and girl bits! HAHAHA
- No Gingerbread house
- No stuffing or rolls for xmas dinner because I forgot to buy it
Then we get a reprieve for almost 3 months until May 1st comes along. That was a special day for our family, we always celebrate May Day and do something fun. Last year we took the kids to the Zoo in Seattle. Not quite sure what I will do with them in May, but I will be doing something fun. And then comes along my birthday in July, and finally E's birthday in October. Technically she's already had her birthday without him, because he was in the hospital and then died the day of her party, but it will still be a hurdle to pass.
I think the next few months will be the hardest for us, but you know what? We'll get through it.
This too shall pass.